Rants of a Bitter Alpha Wolf
Poker February 14th. 2011, 1:41pm
Alpha Wolf – A wolf pack has a definite social structure and rules of conduct. The pack leader is the Alpha Wolf and is dominant over all the other wolves in the pack. The alpha wolf gets to eat first at kills.
I originally wasn’t going to participate in the Survivor Donkey Poker game set up by BuddyDank and Julius Goat, but my competitive spirit got the better of me, and I decided to take part anyway.
Little did I realize I’d be punished for being the best player…the Alpha Wolf… on my team…ex-team.
Of the seven votes cast by my teammates, I was named on six of them after the first tournament.
This, after running the deepest of all of my teammates, providing the best chance to win team immunity, and proving that I am easily the best player on my team.
But Survivor isn’t always about being the strongest, and I realize this. It’s still not gonna stop me from ripping into my former teammates. After all, the Alpha Wolf always fights back when backed into a corner, right?
First off, I understand how rebuy tournaments work, unlike JamyHawk, who apparently doesn’t, even though he somehow managed to take one down in the days leading up to the first event of Survivor Poker.
He shoved a hand early, busted, and then neglected to rebuy…within the first 10 minutes or so of the hour-long rebuy period.
I mean seriously, he Gigli’d the tournament in the most idiotic fashion, and didn’t get voted off?
Then there’s the slew of people that played horribly during the tournament, and were just giving stacks away in spectacular fashion, even after the rebuy period was over. I’m amazed that some of you are even allowed to play poker by loved ones, or maybe they haven’t seen you play yet…oh, by the way….Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!!!
So yes, I eliminated, or ended up decimating the stacks of a few teammates, but let me tell you this. I was NOT going to soft play against you just because you were on my team.
Take for example, Katitude. I crippled her when we both had around 17K in chips. I opened in middle position with QJoff. If you guys know me, if it folds to me, I’ll open with just about anything in middle or late position. This hand was no different. So Kat re-pops me for a minimum raise from the small blind. My first thought was a pair, probably 10’s or better knowing how she plays.
I’m calling here since are stacks are deep, and I can get away after the flop relatively unscathed.
I flop top two on a Q-J-4 board and she puts in a pretty sizable overbet of 5K.
I know Kat’s play well enough to realize that she’s got KK or AA here, because let’s face it, she, like the rest of my teammates, thinks that an overpair to any board is gonna be an automatic winner. I can reasonably rule out QQ or JJ since I have those cards in my hand, and I’m pretty sure she doesn’t re-raise preflop with 44
Her overbet on the flop pretty much telegraphed her hand to me, and it was an easy call with top two. No need to worry about straights or flushes here, because she doesn’t overbet draws like that.
If she plays her Aces a little slower, I’ll still win chips, but I probably wouldn’t have stacked her. Once again, another classic case of a player overvaluing an overpair.
Boom, there’s one bitter vote against me…simply because she butchered Aces, playing them about as poorly as you can in that spot. And I’m the one punished with a vote because I’m the better player.
In another instance, I take out BrainMC when he open-shoves for 18 BB’s with KQoff, and I call with AKoff. Another instance of me getting the bitter vote from a disgruntled teammate who fell in love with pretty picture cards.
I mean really, I’m the bad guy again simply because I’m good???!!!
Did I mention that my teammates overvalue overpairs in post-flop play? Here’s another example.
Julius Goat and I take a flop after I call his 4.5X raise preflop with 88. Pretty standard preflop play by both of us.
I flop a set and he decides to get his remaining 18 big blinds in the middle with…you guessed it…Aces!!!
What am I supposed to do here, fold because he’s a teammate? Hell no!!!
Chalk up another vote against Numb from a bitter teammate who can’t fold an overpair.
These aren’t bad beats either people. When the money got into the middle in each of these instances, I was a clear favorite.
I’m not much of a NLHE player, but next to my former teammates, I look like Stuey freakin’ Ungar.
Yet I’m voted out because I’m better than them. Oh well, the Alpha Wolf will live to hunt again…
Let me just say this, if there comes a time for me to come back and vote at the end of the game (which is what I hear will happen), I will cast my own bitter-vote, and it won’t be for any of my ex-teammates, that’s for certain.
Sincerely,
BitterAlphaWolfNumb
February 14th, 2011 at 1:53 pm
WOW! I LOVE this post. So angry. Goat did not overvalue his overpair.. he just sucks. Der. Everyone hates Numblowme so THAT is why you got voted out. It has nothing to do with poker playing skill. :). Good luck in the worlds best poker player ever contest.. I hear Hoyazo is in that too.
February 14th, 2011 at 2:05 pm
I hereby fully endorse this post. Awesome.
Survival of the donkist!
How DARE you win the first match YOU MUST BE PUNISHED!!
OH BTW blogs are ghey.
February 14th, 2011 at 2:07 pm
Nice rant. I never understood how several people who played Survivor acted like wusses when they were unexpectedly bounced from the game. I think I would be bitter as hell, as would most real competitors.
You can always play pushmonkey at the Mookie Dank and terrorize those who saw fit to vote you out. Muhahahahaha.
February 14th, 2011 at 2:22 pm
I see this is going to be different then all the other tournament series…..
February 14th, 2011 at 2:41 pm
C’mon Numb. Why so much hate on your own teammates? Or maybe you were strategically placed on Team Donkey and told to take us out 1 by 1. My only mishap was a technical one otherwise I’m sure I would have fallen to your knife in the back as well. Hopefully we don’t have any more moles on Team Donkey? Do you want to reveal now who the mole on Team Fish is? I’m sure we will find out soon enough.
February 14th, 2011 at 3:08 pm
This is a wonderful elimination post. Job well done!
You played very well and did exactly as you should. I am very glad that you didn’t soft play team-mates, and I hope nobody does.
You weren’t voted out for busting your team-mates.
Nor were you voted out for Waffles’ suggestion, unpopularity. Nothing could be further from the truth.
The truth is out there. Unfortunately, it is also a closely-guarded state secret.
February 14th, 2011 at 3:34 pm
Did you Hire Hoy as a ghostwriter?
February 14th, 2011 at 3:59 pm
I am pleasantly surprised I didn’t do something worth mentioning in this post.
My vote got bounced back b/c I used the wrong buddydank email, so I can’t even get blamed for this – even if I did vote for you anyway…
February 14th, 2011 at 4:56 pm
Classic 1st guy off rant, just like the real show! Dude thinks he is better than everyone at the game and whines about how awesome he is and no one realizes it until it is too late. Did you ever think that, just like the real survivor, they took out the strongest player because they are just stupid? Or often they will take out the guy who causes the most friction and is the laziest? You are lazy, just admit it.
February 14th, 2011 at 5:15 pm
Way to stoke the fire, Schaubs! More ! More!
February 14th, 2011 at 5:25 pm
The reason I voted for Numb Bono was because he was all “Hey, I’ll build the shelter, just leave it to me, I’ve been studying about shelter building”, and so I was all “OK, that’s fine.” But then all he did was dig this enormous hole in the ground and put banana tree leaves over it and act like he’d done something great and then it rained while we were doing reward challenge and flooded our hole/home and it totally ruined my nana’s blanky that she knitted special for me to bring on the show. Plus he burnt the rice. I didn’t come here to make friends.
February 14th, 2011 at 4:18 pm
Love the rant. The first casualty of the series goes out in spectacular fashion. I open shoved with 18 BB? I see now why I am on team donkey. Funny part is, you had the only card that could beat me once the cards were run out. I hated to see you go, but you were obviously the greatest threat….to your own team! I am glad that the question of soft play was ever in doubt. You did all the right calls, ran well, and outlasted the rest of us so of course we have to punish you for our actions. What, you thought I was gonna say it was my fault that I donked off my stack? Maybe you will see the wisdom of our vote at the final tribal council. You’ve inspired us to play smarter and run better.
February 14th, 2011 at 4:40 pm
There was rice? There was a leaky hole? I spent the night out on the beach all damp with sand up my ass. You guys have to tell me this stuff… unless, it’s all a part of A GIANT CONSPIRACY and I’m next.
FML.
February 15th, 2011 at 8:25 am
Alliances are building! Has there been a merge already?